A town in Russia having problems with bears visiting has come up with a list of do’s and don’ts for possible less-than-pleasant encounters with the beasts.
The guide, a copy of which was acquired by AFP, warns that residents should stay calm and stand still if they meet a bear. “Speak to the bear in a firm voice” and “Don’t turn your back on it,” it adds.
In the worst-case scenario, if the bear attacks, the victim should behave aggressively, the guide says. “Shout angrily at it and look it straight in the eyes,” it advises.
Okie dokie. If I see a bear, I don’t think I’m going to say, “You’re bigger than me and could kill me with one swipe; I want my mommy” in a stern voice while looking it straight in the eyes. You know, ‘cause that would be dumb.