Young punk: I gotta gun and I’ll cap your arse if you don’t give me your money!
Store owner: What? Are you like 90 pounds, soaking wet?
Young punk: I mean it! I will shoot you if you don’t give me all of your money.
Store owner: Dude. Seriously.
Young punk: Don’t make me shoot you with this banana that I have hidden under my shirt to make you think that I have a gun.
Store owner and customer: Yeah, well, we ain’t victims, and we’ll bust your butt and your banana.
(Jumping of the young punk commences and the police arrive.)
Officer: So, uh where is the weapon?
Store owner: He ate it.
(H/T: FOX News)
Here are two more stupid criminals: