“For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD gives grace and glory; no good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”
“You have granted me life and lovingkindness; and Your care has preserved my spirit.”
“Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”
I’ve been doubting and hanging my head over various things I’ve done or decisions I’ve made in the past. So much so, I’ve often wondered if I have missed some of the blessings God has had for me, like I’ve missed something, especially as it pertains to my “calling”.
Sometimes I feel like my biggest mistake was quitting Bible college years back, and then when I resumed college, not going with my gut to go back to Bible college. I know we can’t live in regretville; however, I have done so many dumb things in my lifetime that I just “go there”.
The past few months I’ve been wondering if I have been using the gifts that God has given me the way that He wants me to use them.
I’ve been praying to know what route I should take.
I’m very blessed, so don’t get me wrong. I do realize that God has blessed me, and I am so grateful for those blessings that I just cannot find the words to really express it. But, I just wonder what more I could have been doing the past 10 years. Maybe I wouldn’t have had the health issues. Maybe I would have had the life I prayed for so much of my life leading up to this point. To be frank, it is one of the reasons I don’t go to my home church. I just end up sitting there wondering what my life might have been, because I have all the memories of my childhood floating around me.
Even through all of this and the times I’m sure I’ve disappointed God, His grace abounds. He’s protected me from a lot of harm, and he’s provided immensely. He’s shown me His love in spite of myself.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all show each other that kind of grace, rather than bitterness? I’m glad He loves me. He loves you, too.
“Wonderful Grace of Jesus”–The Cathedrals
(I’m going old-school this week.)
My church used to love to stop the accompaniment to the hymns so that we could sing acapella. This was one of the hymns we would sing, heartily. Imagine 200-300 people of all ages picking parts and going with it. I miss those days.)