HEADLINES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Silly...that is just Madam Speaker (sans make-up) on her way to the plastic surgeon for some touch-ups.

Silly...that is just Madam Speaker (sans make-up) on her way to the plastic surgeon for some touch-ups.

1.  Rep. Frank calls Scalia ‘homophobe’ in interview…
Yeah, well, Bawney is a straight-a-phobe!

2.  Stimulus? USA to buy Chinese condoms, ending Alabama jobs…
Poor quality condoms…just what the world needs.  Oh, and thanks for killing some jobs while y’all are at it!  Dangit.

3.  NASA halts test of urine recycler…
Guess that wasn’t lemon Tang.  Oops!

4.  Japanese astronaut tests stink-free underwear…
Ummm….this speaks for itself.

5.  Runaway kangaroos on the loose in France
Meanwhile, the Pink Panther is tearing up the Australian outback.

6.  Brussels sets world record in longest toilet queue
Those Brussel sprouts will get ya every time!

7.  Obama team seeks eco-friendly coffee cups
Hey, guys…there are these new-fangled things made of ceramic.  You can use them every day, unless they break.  Oh, and you can wash them out at the end of the day.  I use one at work.  They are nifty.

8. King’s head, in jar, going home to Ghana
That beats Prince Albert in a can, any day.

9.  Apocalyptic film hits anxious chord
Oh wait, that was just a reel of the news of the past two months.

10.  Nebraska Town Finds New Use for Old Electric Chair
Behavior problems have diminished since the use of the chair as a “time-out” or “naughty seat” has been instituted.  I hear the added zapping sound effects add just enough fear to keep the kiddies on the straight and narrow.

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7 thoughts on “HEADLINES!!!!!!!!!!!!

  1. Snigs
    Sounds like you need #10, lately.
    It would put rumors to rest if it was Elvis.

    cbullitt
    🙂 YUP!

    Admiral
    Well, thank you! 🙂

    Rick
    Well, she’s a beaut. Heh.

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